Slump

It seems these days that as soon as I set myself a writing goal I’m unable to meet it. 2016 being the first year that I’m out of University I decided to take the opportunity to really get into my writing. I researched a bunch of competitions and devised a schedule for my blog. Then I sat down and lined up all the story ideas I’d been working on and placed them with the writing competitions that most suited the idea. After that, all that was left to do was write. I had my first idea for a competition all lined up, a story I had been devising since late 2015. I was excited to get into this piece; at 2000 words it should have been something I was able to bang out pretty quickly. The story is now due in three days and I’ve only just broken the 500 word mark.

This kind of slump isn’t irregular for me. I find inspiration at the most inappropriate times. It will generally be when I’m ridiculously busy at work. Suddenly an amazing idea will come to me and it doesn’t matter how much else I have to do because I need to get this story out of me before it’s gone for good. Most recently my inspiration has been coming to me while I’m driving. While driving through some picturesque Sydney streets the other day I had a surge of inspiration on how to tie up my most recent story, unable to write it down while driving I convinced myself that I would remember this perfect idea. Of course, by the time I arrived home I had completely forgotten it. I’m currently still living with the hope that it’ll come back to me and I can finish this tedious story.

Inspiration and motivation are funny things. Without the push to write, an idea means nothing. Without an idea there’s no reason to write. I often wonder how I can force myself into having a great idea, but I know there’s no way. My hope is that inspiration is like a muscle. If I try to read, watch or do things that have the potential to inspire as often as possible then maybe I will train myself to be inspired more often. If I reward my inspiration by bringing my ideas to fruition then hopefully I can grow my motivation too.

Up until this point in my life the things I have done have been to fulfil a criteria set by others. Write an essay for a grade, write a blog for work, write a story to be published. Now that I’m the one setting the goals and giving myself the deadlines I feel a lot less motivation to actually achieve the things I set out to do. Somehow doing something for myself seems a lot less important than doing it for others, and that’s something I want to change. With any luck, by setting myself these goals and then forcing myself to achieve them I’m making myself my own boss. I’m hoping to train myself to see my hobbies as my future, and as more than just my private ramblings. Hopefully this endeavour will be a success and my slump will come to an end in a blaze of competition submissions and completed blogs. If not, well, this blog may be the last I write before I shrivel up into an uninspired heap.

Wish me luck!